


Kith and Kin

by Hiver_Frost_Elf



Series: Coldwave's Battle Baby [1]
Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Accidental Baby Acquisition, Accidental Barry Acquisition, Alternate Universe - Gods & Goddesses, Babies, ColdwaveWeek2018, Family, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-27
Updated: 2018-05-27
Packaged: 2019-05-14 07:19:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14765105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hiver_Frost_Elf/pseuds/Hiver_Frost_Elf
Summary: Papa, where do babies come from?Well, kiddo, mortal babies come from wombs, but you came from me and your daddy tearing the world apart for ten days.





	Kith and Kin

**Author's Note:**

> brainstormed with Louis

Cold: god of frost, leadership, and thieves.

Heatwave: god of fire, loyalty, and hunters.

Golden Glider: goddess of earth, treasure, and revelers.

Mortals were content with their pantheon of three.  The deities were content to be three.  They loved each other, but they got sick of each other sometimes.  Mortals would implore Golden Glider to restore peace before her brother and brother-in-law destroyed entire cities.

It was during such a time that freezing winds clashed with scorching ones.  Clouds crowded the sky.  Heatwave had gone from melting snow to flinging fire Cold’s way.  Cold had gone from dousing flames to thrusting ice at Heatwave.  Their shouts bred gales, and their punches felled trees.  Valleys formed each time one drove the other into the ground.

Their latest blow called golden energy from the heavens, knocking them both back into forests.  A crack roared through the air.  Both gods worried that they’d broken the other’s bones.  They raced towards each other as fast as they could.

Golden eyes popped open when they arrived at a newly-formed crater: a cradle for a baby with bronze hair, a baby who grinned and reached out to the gods when they approached him.

“...Fuck!” said Heatwave.

“Fuh fuh fuh fuh fuh fuh!”

Cold rolled his eyes, “Oh look, baby’s first curse.”

The baby babbled even more excitedly when Heatwave scooped him up.  He patted Heatwave’s broad nose, “Aiyayaya!”

“We could give him to a mortal family.  Mortals pray for children all the time.  They’d love a—” Cold’s eyes bugged out when sparks danced between the baby’s fingers, “...lightning lad.”

The baby murdered that plan with puppyish eyes and a toothless pout, “Ooooo...”

“Your daddy’s just kiddin’, kiddo,” Heatwave nosed him after wiping away the drool that bubbled out of his mouth.  Both Cold and Heatwave wanted to memorize his resulting giggles. “Wanna hold ‘im?”

Cold tensed up, then turned away, “I probably shouldn’t...”

“Hey,” Heatwave maneuvered him into Cold’s arms. “You’re not your dad, and you ain’t gonna become ‘im either.”

Cold’s lips formed a small smile, his heart swelling with hope.  Their baby cooed, his feet wriggling against Cold’s arm, his own reaching towards Cold’s face.

* * *

Golden Glider cackled when they told her that their latest battle created her nephew, “You sure you were fighting?”

“Shaddup!” Heatwave messed up her precious hair before washing his hands to prepare lunch with the mortals’ offerings.

Golden Glider stuck her tongue out at her brother-in-law before cooing at her nephew, “What’s your name, little baby?”

“Flash Fire—Flash Freeze!” Heatwave and Cold said at the same time.  Not all of their disagreements wreaked havoc on the world.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for taking time to read this! Enjoy what you do here and everywhere! Enjoy the rest of Coldwave Week 2018!


End file.
